In the head of a food addict

 

 

img_8430

When I decided I wanted to enter the blog world I made a promise to myself. That I would open myself up to be vulnerable. With that being said, on November 1, 2018 I finally admitted that I have a food addiction. I hit an all time low while I was driving around to feed my addiction and knew something had to change.

After a morning of running errands, I looked at my watch to realize it was 1p.m. and I hadn’t ate all day. I went from content to hanrgy real quick! Which of course was accompanied by road rage and the mentality that I had to eat right then and there. With the memory of the Slim Chickens I had recently ate, I instantly became obsessed that I had to have their garlic Parmesan wings. I pulled into the drive thru and proceeded to order the mouth watering wings. That was until my world was shattered. The words “we are all out” led to the beginning of my melt down. I sped out of that drive thru infuriated. Why was the world depriving me of what my body needs?

Right down the road was my favorite burger place. I was able to cheer myself up by the thought of a juicy cheeseburger with a side of cheese curds. Yes, it would in fact be delicious! When I arrived in the drive-thru I attempted to get the attention of the worker for a good 3 minutes before deciding they must not hear me, so ill pulled up to the window. Taped on the window was a note that they were temporarily closed and to visit their other location. At that moment, I cried. Right there in the drive thru I had a complete meltdown because of food.

I had hit an all time low you guys. I’m not sure how long I sat in that A&W parking lot trying to compose myself but it felt like a lifetime. This is just one example of how much a food addiction has controlled my life. One a regular basis I would build the excitement of my day around what food I would get to eat. Food has always been in the center of my life and you may think I’m kidding but my addiction is no joke. I’ve always related food to comfort. Growing up that meant my mom cooking our favorites and getting to catch up on how everyone’s days were. I looked forward to those hearty home cooked meals with my families and never taught myself limitations. When I moved out on my own that habit carried over.

Everyday I have a internal battle with myself. When I experience craving and I ask myself “does my body need this?”. It’s been very beneficial to start this journey of controlling my eating habits while establishing a regular workout schedule. Right before I dig into a bag of Doritos, I remind myself how much I’ll puke during my run if I do. Does that mean that I gave up eating Nachos on a regular basis? Heck no, girl! Mexican is a necessary food group in my life. I have learned how to manage self control. Meal prepping has been a huge life saver! While prepping out my meals I portion out reasonable portions to avoid over-eating and ensure I’m eating enough of each food group. I also prep all of my daily snacks, which I feel like a lot of people forget about. If you plan on running errands after work be sure to pack a snack so you don’t get hangry before you get home to cook supper. Eat with intention to fuel yourself and I promise your body will thank you!

Truly Yours,

Jer❤

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s